


Sleep and Murder

by ElReyCiervo



Series: Yulmallen AU Drabbles [2]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Alma lives, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Fluff, Language, Lavi's shenanigans, M/M, Multi, Nonbinary Alma Karma, Nonbinary Character, Other, Polyamory, Sleep, Yulmallen, Yulmallen AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-19
Updated: 2016-08-19
Packaged: 2018-08-09 19:49:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7814806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElReyCiervo/pseuds/ElReyCiervo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drabble #2) Sleep is important, and Allen and Kanda try to prevent their partner from committing homicide.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleep and Murder

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own D . Gray-Man  
> Warning: Some language and violence.

There was an incessant knocking at the door of Allen's room, and all the occupants knew it would not stop until one of them answered it. Allen sighed in irritation into his pillow before lifting his head and nudging Alma. "It's your turn to get up."

 "I got up last tiiiime!" Alma complained as he clutched Allen closer to their chest. Their chestnut hair tickled his cheek. Being so close to them, Allen could feel when they poked Kanda with their foot. "Yuu, I'm pretty sure it's your turn."

 "Fucking hell, it's one in the morning. I am _not_ getting up—not even for the Usagi." Even in the near darkness, the white-haired man could tell Kanda's eye was twitching. Allen could not blame Kanda, to be honest. They had all just gotten back from long missions a few hours ago and wanted to catch up on sleep, but Lavi seemed dead set on bothering them.

 "Guuuuuys," came the whiny voice behind the door, "I know it's late, but I _really, really_ need my notebooks. I have work to finish by the morning, and Panda's gonna kill me if it doesn't get done!" As sharp as his memory was, Lavi had a bad habit of leaving his things all over the place. Allen knew what it was like to be hounded by someone all the time—as good of a person Link was, he did not quite know the meaning of break times—so, before he, Kanda, and Alma had left for their missions, he had offered Lavi his room in order to escape Bookman. But for everything that was good and holy, Lavi needed to leave them the hell _alone_. This would be a lesson to him to keep better track of his things. _Serves him right—Bookman will take care of him in the morning._

 They all groaned when they heard another desperate, "Pleeeeeaaase?"

 "If we don't fucking answer him, he'll go away."

 Alma grit their teeth as they shifted, moving Allen in the process, in order to glare at Kanda. "Don't lie, Yuu," their response was almost a hiss. "He's as stubborn as the both of you." Allen could hear the _pure_ vexation in their voice. While Alma was normally bubbly and warm and cheerful, they coveted any sleep they could get like a precious resource. It didn't help that all of their missions had completely wiped out all three of them—they had all looked like zombies by the time they had flopped down on Allen's bed. Alma was the worst off between the three of them, having fought off a Noah without backup. _Which was stupid, stupid, stupid. They should have called us._

His inner voice, which sounded a lot like his two partners talking at the same time, called him out as blatant hypocrite.

Allen was pretty sure that Lavi's annoying pleas could constitute as desperate begging at this point. "I know I'm being a bother, but you gotta help a guy out! C'mon, I have really important stuff in those notebooks that have to get _doooooone_. You don't want your good ol' buddy Lavi to be clawed to death by Panda, would you???"

"I'd pay for a front row seat." Kanda raised his voice loud enough for Lavi to hear.

A pause, then even more knocking rapped against the door. "That's cruel, Yuu! I had a feeling you would say that, but I'm sure that the _wonderful_ and _spectacular_ and _awesome_ Allen and Alma would be oooooh so kind and generous as to help out a friend like me." The rapping changed pattern to emphasize the frantic pitch of his voice.

A snort. _What a kiss-ass_.

As Lavi become even more and more incessant, Allen could feel himself grow more and more irritable. His left hand clutched his pillow tighter as if that could distract him from the annoying rabbit at the door. He heard more than felt the delicate fabric of the cotton pillowcase shred, but he could not bring himself to care at the moment. Another annoying plea, this time even louder than before (he thanked the God he hated that his room was a ways away from anyone else's), came floating into the room. Part of him—a very large part of him—genuinely contemplated long, drawn-out murder at this point. Bugger the thought of what Central would do if they found out if they murdered an exorcist, and a _Bookman's apprentice_ at that. _It would be worth it_ , he thought as he glowered at the door. _I would get some quality sleep, and Alma would stop gritting their teeth and clenching their fists around me. Hell, I bet even Kanda would get a decent eight hours for a change._ "I'm seriously putting homicide on the table right now," he drawled.

The kisses against his cheek meant full approval from the other two.

"Yuuuuuu~!" Kanda was set on not answering again as he turned, pulled the blanket over his head, and buried his face further into his pillow. A muffled sentence rose from the linen mound that could be roughly translated to 'Fuck him, I've slept through worse.'

"Alleeeeeen~!"

He heard a highly irritated growl rumble through Alma's chest, so he placed a hand on the others cheek to try and placate them. "I'm so freaking tired, Al," they scowled as they nosed his white hair, trying to calm theirself. "I want him to go away, but I want to teach him a lesson, too." Allen completely understood what Alma meant, but while he could run on a few hours of sleep (insomnia was such a lovely and delightful gift), he was worried how Alma would fare come morning time—especially considering being drained from their mission.

"Almaaaaaa~!"

Allen felt Alma give a full body twitch when they heard their voice. As Lavi continued to chant Alma's name, Allen began to worry for his ribs as the grip around him was getting tighter and tighter. He's had much worse, but he would like to keep his bones intact for a change. "Hey, just ignore him, love," he whispered, "He'll turn blue in the face after a while, and then have to face Bookman's wrath in a few hours. Just think about that, huh? I'm sure you'll laugh at breakfast when you see all those slash marks on his face."

His partner seemed to mull this over for a moment. "I guess, but—"

" _Alma, Alma, Alma, Almaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!"_

The scowl on Allen's face mirrored the fiercer one on Alma's. "Bloody hell, he's persistent."

The breath of air that flowed past Alma's lips sounded less of an irritated sigh and more like the furious start-up of one of those new motor vehicles. "Okay, Al. You're right, I'll at least have something to look forward to at—"

" _Aaaalmaaaaa!_ Alma, Alma, dearest Almaaaa! Almaaaaaa, _my frieeeeeeeeeend_! Alma, Alma Alma, Al—"

"THAT'S FUCKING IT!" Alma roared as they shot up and shoved Allen away from them, then wrenched away the blanket. "I'M SO **DONE**!" They leapt off the bed and charged for the door in a more coordinated move that should have been done this early in the morning. It took Allen longer than it should have to process that Alma wasn't going to just give Lavi his book an come back to bed, but instead _flay him alive with the sharp blade that his arm became— **Oh fuck, he was really going to murder Lavi!**_

Kanda must have realized it at the same time as he had because the other man sprang up, exchanging an equally _oh-shit-this-is-bad_ look with one another. "Fuck, he's _actually_ going to kill Lavi!"

They detangled themselves from the blanket in order to try and stop their partner. Shit, **_this_ ** was why people were wise enough to not bother Alma liked they bothered Kanda. As sweet and caring as Alma was, they could be _deadly_ when pushed far enough, vicious to the point where only Kanda or Allen could reign them in (A finder was found mauled black, blue, and bloody in the back of the Order's garden after he had publically insulted Allen and Kanda. Everyone knew who it had been without needing to say). Unfortunately for Lavi, his specialty was knowing just how to annoy people the perfect way.

The door was flung open as Alma shot their arm down like a spear, only missing Lavi by inches because he had heard their shout beforehand. The red-head let out a high-pitched shriek as he turned tail and ran down the hall. "Don't kill me! I just need my noteboooooks!"

"You're _gonna be mincemeat when I'm through with you, Lavi_!" Alma charged right after him, thick chestnut hair all over the place and bladed arm slashing madly through the air.

Jesus Christ, Alma was fast. Kanda was out of the room before Allen, raven hair whipping behind him and a frantic note in his voice, "Fucking hell, Alma, he's not worth it!"

They turned a corner just in time to hear an awfully pained shriek and a spray of scarlet in the air. "Alma, I wasn't serious about the homicide!" Allen yelled, going to restrain Alma before they could do more damage.

Sleep eluded all of them for the next four hours.

* * *

Lavi was off the mission roster for the next week and a half in order to let the gash in his side heal properly.  Alma was happier than they had been in a long while, and Allen and Kanda made sure that Alma got enough sleep every night.

While each of them had to take on an extra mission each in order to pull Lavi's slack, Allen had to admit that the quiet every night was quite enjoyable.

Plus, it had been a little funny to see Lavi near pass out from fright.

* * *

Published: 8/19/17

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: When it comes to sleep, Alma has a short fuse.
> 
> A/N 2: Thank you to everyone who left kudos in the last installment and bookmarked, and thanks to Ena for dropping a comment!
> 
> A/N 3: This will also be posted on my FF page and my badlydrawnyullen tumblr blog


End file.
